Friday, June 18, 2021

Aria Wilder's birth story

It's been a minute since I've blogged or written a birth story but I figure now is a good time to document again. Aria Wilder Howard arrived in a hurry on June 4th 2021 at 10:02 am after 2 hours of labor with a weird false start (or maybe prodromal labor?? I don't know what to call it) the previous day. 7 lbs 14 oz, 20.5 in long. She was a surprise girl (we didn't find out during pregnancy if we were having a boy or girl) and she decided to arrive ahead of schedule a day after 39 weeks. I joked we'd definitely have this baby during the annual June snowstorm but luckily we didn't have one of those this year. She was a spur of the moment water birth baby which was fitting as seahorses became her theme early on in my pregnancy. I happened to mention to Travis that we had a seahorse baby. I meant that as a fetus size comparison but he misunderstood and thought I'd gotten a real seahorse (not unreasonable as we have 3 aquariums in addition to all our other pets and plants and bugs). Then he was concerned about where the seahorse was when he couldn't find it in any of our aquariums, thinking I'd left it in the car. So Aria got a seahorse themed room.

Quick recap of the first 2 births for reference. Lyra was born at a birth center at 40 weeks exactly, labor was about 11 hours but 5 of it was pushing. Oswin was late by probably 5 days (his due date was all over the place measurement wise) and I took castor oil to get things going. He was born in the hospital after we transfered from a homebirth because of a lot of bleeding and seemingly no progress dilating.  I dilated at lightning speed as soon as the ambulance got there but pushed for almost 2 hours with him. Labor was 9 hours total. I expected a fairly quick labor with this one. I thought I could cut down pushing time to an hour or less hopefully. I didn't expect only 2 hours total though. 

So I was 39 weeks exactly, this one due date never wavered. My mom was with me and the kids for the day, we went to storytime, pretty standard. Around 2 pm I started to have what felt like braxton hicks contractions. Not painful but with a lot of pressure. That's the best I have to describe it. I also just felt off. Again, that's the best way to describe it which isn't very helpful, I know. After about 2 hours of this I told my mom what was going on and went to try and shower and see if they'd slow down. I also got Travis headed home for the weekend an hour early (he works 45 minutes away so it takes him a while to get home) and started chatting with the midwife on call at the birth center. The birth center is about an hour drive from our house so I wanted to get going earlier on in labor rather than later as driving while in very active labor is very unpleasant. 

At this point the contractions were about 2 minutes apart, which was enough to have us headed to Springs to get a hotel for the night. Again though, they were painless which was kind of confusing me. It was handy because we were able to talk to the kids and leave in less than a rush. The kids were staying at home with my parents for the night. On the drive contractions slowed to every 6 or 7 minutes but they also started to hurt. Very mild pain, but I was hopeful. I had had painful contractions sporadically the last couple weeks of this pregnancy but nothing had ever been timeable. 

Contractions like this continued through dinner and checking into a hotel a mile from the birth center, just a few minutes drive. Once we got to our hotel I tried walking around to get things going. My contractions increased to every 2 minutes or so again but the pain disappeared if I was standing. At that point I was starting to have doubts and getting frustrated. I tried laying down and contractions went back to slightly painful but slowed down and started to feel like they were dying down entirely.  We ended up going to bed and contractions basically completely stopped overnight. Had an occasional mild one but that was no different than the last month or so of pregnancy. The next morning was when everything happened rather quickly. 

I woke up at around 5 and couldn't go back to sleep. I stayed in bed with only a contraction or two over the next couple hours until Travis woke up around 7:50. At that point we discussed what to do and started to get up and get ready for the day. We decided we would just head home and hopefully there would be no more false alarms until real labor. I texted updates to the midwife, my birth photographer, and family that we'd be headed home. Pretty much immediately upon getting up though, contractions started up and were both frequent and slightly painful even while walking. Then I had some spotting and after Oswin's birth when I had lots of bleeding, I pretty much decided I wanted to at a minimum, stop by to be checked at the birth center. 

So we spent the next few minutes getting ready and texting back everyone important that we'd completely changed plans again and would be staying in town. At 8:15 or so I sent Travis out to pick up coffees, bagels, and smoothies while I timed contractions. I ended up timing from 8:30 to 9 according to my contraction tracker app. During that half hour things progressed rather quickly. Contractions were every few minutes but I was having trouble concentrating on tracking and was starting to really have to stop pacing and breathe through them. Travis got back a bit before 9 and we had a phone call with the midwife right at 9. She asked us to come in around 9:15 or 9:20. I made it maybe five minutes and one or two more contractions before I told Travis, "We're leaving now, grab the stuff." I booked it down the hall and made it outside before the next contraction hit. I apparently have a habit of not waiting for Travis to keep up when we're changing locations in labor. I remember glancing at the clock in the car and noticing it was 9:11 at one point. When we arrived at the birth center. I had my one moment of rudeness the whole labor. Due to covid and having 2 kids already Travis had only been to the birth center maybe twice before. So he didn't immediately pull into the parking spaces I wanted and drove past but had to turn around. I snapped, "What are you doing, I said the parking is over there." He knew better than to do anything but calmly say, "I know, I'm turning around." But now he's going to mock me forever for being mean to him. Once we parked, I once again didn't wait for him and I booked it into the birth center. 

We arrived at the birth center at 9:15 or so and from that point on I lost all concept of time and had no idea how quickly things were going. I immediately wanted to get in the tub but they had some setup to finish first. We had a cervical check at that point around 9:30. I was told it was hard to tell because my water bag was bulging but that I was an 8 or 9, so very close to complete. After that I got into the tub. Now with Lyra I got to use a tub too and it was nice but nothing special. Plus I never really wanted a water birth anyway and had to get out due to my long pushing stage. To be honest, even after research it just kind of freaked me out to have a water birth and I'm not a tub person anyway. But this time as soon I got into the tub I was like "Oh, I get it now, this is so much more comfortable. Guess I'm having a water birth." I didn't bother to tell Travis my change of plan but also I didn't want to jinx anything and was afraid I'd be pushing for ages and have to get out of the tub anyway. My water broke shortly after I got in the tub and I started to feel pushy. We were told 9:47 was when I started to push. Travis said he thought about mentioning I didn't want a water birth but he didn't want to stress me out if I was fine. It felt like much longer but apparantly only took my 15 minutes and Aria was born at 10:02. Travis said he initially didn't believe when the midwife said baby was crowning (I did because I could feel it). I got to catch Aria and pick her up out of the water which was really cool. We got out of the tub pretty quickly after birth and once we got over to the bed we were able to check and confirm Aria was a girl. We kept it a surprise until birth but when I'd picked her up I was fairly confident I didn't feel any obvious boy parts. We had a boy and girl name picked out beforehand, we ended up using our boy name for her middle name. 

Since I'd had a night of sleep and hadn't had to labor for long, I was feeling pretty good. It has definitely been the easiest physical recovery so far. We were at home shortly after 3 pm that afternoon. It was a bit surreal to have a baby so quickly and be back home so fast and to feel so ok after birth. My last recoveries went fine but this was even better. 

We had a birth photographer again and managed to get a few labor pictures despite how quickly I gave birth. I was so glad my photographer got there in time to catch the birth. And we got tons of new baby pictures and family pictures as well. 

Overall it was the smoothest birth I've had and I think I coped with the pain the best I have and put all my extra energy into getting baby out. Certainly it was the most I've been in control and quiet throughout birth. And I feel pretty strong to just have a baby and get up and walk out of the tub with her. It was a whirlwind of a day to go from "No way am I going into labor today," to "I just had a baby" in two hours. We're lucky we had the false alarm we did or we likely would have had a roadside baby. If Travis had been home we might have made it to the birth center but if he was at work we would definitely be paying a hefty cleaning fee for the new car. 

We're settling in to newborn life again. It's interesting seeing little features and behaviors we recognize from our older kids but also seeing brand new things too. Travis has nicknamed her Mater, because she gets quite red and her head has always been super round, even immediately after birth, so he says she looks like a little tomato. Being a mom of three is basically just upping the chaos level a bit. I had to cut slime and sequins out of the cat's fur today. Lyra has taken to regularly sitting on top of her ride in toy car out in the front yard and making wild animal calls. Also we have a new pest control beetle in the house this week for my plant babies, less obtrusive than the lady bugs actually. And our 50 baby pleco fish are thriving and growing a lot. So we're always busy around here again. Sometimes I think about how quiet and calm things were when it was just me and Travis (and Roxi) 10 years ago and I can't really imagine it anymore. 

Also here's the story in pictures.